Monday 14 August 2023

Toffee Questions The Cat Food

The Old Woman called me entitled, just because I sent her this message today. Entitled? I prefer to think I just have high standards.

(This conversation is included in my book Catty Conversations: Letters From A Feline Diva).

Dear Old Woman,

The time has come for me to reiterate my requirements for my comestibles. Before dishing up any old slop, ask yourself the following questions:

  • Is this food of an acceptable quality?
  • Have you read the ingredients list?
  • Does it have added vitamins?
  • Have you tasted it?
  • Did it come from a foil tray?
  • Do posh cats eat it?
  • Could you put it on a silver plate?
  • Does it contain prawns?
The answers to all these questions should be yes.


Dear Toffee,

All the food we give you is perfectly fine and of good quality. I am not going to taste it first, you will not always get it from a foil tray and it may not necessarily contain prawns.

You have two choices, Toffee. Take it or leave it.

The Old Woman

 That’s it. I’m going to starve.

Look at this!

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  1. Egads, human cannot taste cat food...GROSS!

    1. I agree that their palates are not as discerning as a cat's but my view is if it's not good enough for them, then it's not good enough for us!!

    2. I tend to taste the food, myself. lol As a child, I thought our dog Tina's Gaines-Burgers tasted pretty good out of the pouches. :P

  2. I hope you get lots of prawns for dinner today!!!

    1. I hope so too, Sandra, although I'm not holding my breath! My old man and old woman usually come home from work and sling some kind of meaty stuff from a pouch into my bowl. It's OK - but not as good as prawns!

  3. Her reply is not good enough, Toffee! If Flynn had something that did not meet his full approval he would scoop it up with his paw to eat, and every other pawful was flung onto the fridge door!

    1. Flynn is obviously a smart cat who demands high standards!