My friend is caught in the act - note contrite expression.
Here is an excerpt about experiments from my book. 'A book?' You ask. 'Has Toffee written a book?' Yes I have! See adverts all over this blog. Well, I didn't want anyone to miss the fact that I HAVE WRITTEN A BOOK.
In order to increase the sum of human knowledge, I have been investigating the effects of gravity on random objects.
The results of my experiments:
Coffee mug. Will break. Effect: Liquid content will spread and stain pale rug. Secondary effect: The old woman will scream and rush to get the carpet cleaner.
Jar of jam/jelly. Will break. Effect: Floor becomes sticky. Very sticky. Secondary effect: If anyone (*looks innocent) walks through it they will leave jammy footprints all over the house.
Newspaper. Will fall apart. Effect: The old man will bundle it back together again while swearing. Quite loudly. Secondary effect: The old man will start reading an article and become very confused because he's got the pages in the wrong order.
Glass bowls. Will break. Effect: The old woman will be upset because it was a gift from Aunt Maud. Secondary effect: The old man will do a fist pump because he's always hated it.
Pillow. Will fall and look very inviting. Too inviting. Effect: Zzzzzzzz.Secondary effect: Zzzzzzzz.
I'm thinking of changing my name to Einstein.
My blog That's Purrfect is also in the A to Z Challenge. Read it here www.thatspurrfect.co.uk
* * * * * * *Well, I've finally done it. I have written my no-holds-barred exposé of my life. Prepare to be AMAZED, prepare to be SHOCKED, prepare to be ENTHRALLED. Left is the paperback, right is the Kindle version.