Monday 9 October 2023

Toffee: Feline Guru

As an experiment the old woman used AI to generate
this picture. What do you think?

Some of you may not be aware that I am something of a guru in the feline world. I often get letters from other cats asking for my advice. The one below is included in my book Catty Conversations: Letters From a Feline Diva.

Toffee’s Advice Column

Dear Toffee,

I admire all that you do, especially when it comes to feline activities around the home. I have followed your lead and have taken to knocking a few things onto the floor, like books, pens, a mug and a couple of ornaments.

My problem is that when I tried to knock the big food mixer off the kitchen counter it was too heavy.

Do you have any recommendations for how to shift heavy objects?


Whoa there, Gerald,

The object is to be an endearing mischief maker not a complete barbarian.

You seem to be doing well enough with the smaller stuff. Stick to that so that your people aren’t tempted to swap you for a well-behaved rabbit.


Look at this: 

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  1. Keep it simple...good advice, Toffs!

  2. Good advice Toffee! Who would want to be swapped for a rabbit!

  3. ther bee timez when it iz a good thing two have a dawg
    round de houz….like now….when stuffz kneadz two bee knocked
    over….ore down 😺😺

    1. True - and they are very handy to blame things on!

  4. I'm of the opinion that housecats prove the earth is round. Otherwise, everything would have been knocked into outer space. lol

    1. Ha-ha! I'd never thought of that. Good point!