Dear Old Man and Old Woman,
Scientists have proved beyond all reasonable doubt that you need to increase my prawn supply quite considerably or I will die from malnutrition. #ScientificFact #NotMadeUpAtAll #AbsolutelyTrue
Yours In Anticipation,
(Do you think this will work? They're a bit dim so they'll probably believe me.)
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* * * * * * *Well, I've finally done it. I have written my no-holds-barred exposé of my life - best book ever. Prepare to be AMAZED, prepare to be SHOCKED, prepare to be ENTHRALLED. Left is the paperback, right is the Kindle version.